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Joanna Lindenbaum

On Popularity & Reputation In The Online World

December 12th, 2014 by Joanna Lindenbaum

Being a business owner in the online age has created a pervasive culture of “popular” and “not popular.”

Popularity & Status have, of course, been around way before Twitter, Facebook and online marketing, but the digital age simply makes it easier for individuals to rise in popularity (particularly in the coaching industry).

Unfortunately, the digital age also makes it easier for business owners to feel “not popular enough” or like you’ll never have a seat at the table with the “gurus” or even “semi-gurus” in your field.

If you feel a little depressed when you see other folks get a bazillion Likes on their posts or have tens of thousands of folks in their newsletter community, it can push you straight back into middle school angst – where you wanted so badly to be part of the clique of popular girls, to be seen and loved….and feeling frustration mixed with self-loathing if you weren’t.

OK, so maybe that’s just my middle school story….

But here’s the thing – status & popularity are not the most important things when it comes to business success, or happiness, for that matter.

Here is something that can create way more of an impact for you & your business:

Substance

Substance is:

–providing rich content that is super-useful for your clients and community

–speaking and marketing a sacred message that is important to you

–being fully yourself and letting all the layers of your brilliance shine through

When you focus on providing Substance through your business – instead of lamenting how others are more popular than you – here’s what happens:

You create a reputation for yourself.

Clients keep on returning to you.
They tell their friends about you.
And those friends tell their friends once they’ve experienced you.

When you create a reputation for yourself, more business comes in and more folks get to be served by you and hear your message.

And this can happen whether you “get” 1,000 likes on a Facebook post or not.

And this can happen whether you are one of the perceived cool girls in your industry or not.

And this can happen whether you’ve published a book or not.

And this can happen whether your new product is trending on social media or not.

After being in business for a decade, I know without a doubt that there are plenty of clients and income and opportunities to fulfill your sacred purpose, and it’s not just the gurus that can enjoy all of this.

There is plenty for you too, whether or not you ultimately become a guru or super popular girl.

Popularity & Status are the latest trend…

Substance & Reputation are deeper, more authentic, and usually much longer lasting.

To me, Substance & Reputation trump popularity & status every day of the week.

That doesn’t mean it’s not awesome to be totally popular on Facebook, if that’s something that speaks to you. It just means that substance & reputation create deeper, more long-lasting effects for you and your business, “popular girl” or not.

So if you want to create more of a reputation for yourself & your business, my invitation to you is to get as clear as you possibly can on your brilliance and your sacred message and utilize it every single day in your work, in your marketing, and in your life.

Become your message.
Share your substance.
Don’t hold back on all the things you’re amazing at.
Love up your clients and community members every day.

And don’t try to be someone you’re not.

Most important: be and love yourself.
And know how valuable you are.

If you want to build your business on these principles, and in a way that honors your time and energy, then get in touch for a complimentary Intuition Activation Conversation.

Either myself or one of my coaches will get on the phone with you for a life-changing experience that will take you deep into yourself and your truest desires, help you activate your inner wisdom, and get super clear on all of the blocks that have been standing in your way. We’ll also look closely to see if working together would be a good fit, and what that could look like for you.

Xoxoxoxoxo,
Joanna

Breast Clogs, Rancid Oil & Methane (!?!)

November 21st, 2014 by Joanna Lindenbaum

Last week, I led some of my top-level clients through a transformative 3-day journey here in Charlotte.

I am fully in my brilliance when I am leading groups in person, and in this particular retreat, I was really in the zone.

I knew that each woman present was experiencing something life changing, and it felt AMAZING to know that I was at the center of that.

Unfortunately, my incredible feelings of satisfaction, joy, and accomplishment were eclipsed by worry and anxiety.

Let me explain what was happening in my personal life as this retreat was happening:

Night 1: I came home happy and tired after a wonderful day and really wanted to take a hot bath and r-e-l-a-x.

I drew a bath and threw in some bath oils. I noticed that the oils smelled a little funny, but didn’t really pay attention. I got into the bath and noticed that the oil felt kinda funny on my body, but didn’t really pay attention. And then it hit me: the oil was seriously rancid.

It took me 2 hours and 5 different soaps to scrub it all off my body and get the smell off, too. My relaxing evening turned into total anxiety.

Night 2: I came home from another amazing retreat day…only to realize that the milk ducts in my right breast were completely clogged because I hadn’t been nursing enough.

In the 7 months that I’ve been nursing Yael, this is the FIRST time that it’s happened. A clogged milk duct is really serious, because it could lead to infection and also reduced milk for the baby.

I spent the entire evening with heating pads, trying to massage the clog out. Big stress and worry.

Night 3: As soon as I finished hugging all of the women from the retreat good-bye, feeling incredibly satisfied that each one had multiple huge breakthroughs, I found out that we had a methane leak at home and had to sleep somewhere else for a few days.

Instead of keeping calm and collected, especially since it’s no big deal because my very gracious in-laws took us in, I freaked out. As in: had a total breakdown and HUGE complaining fit to Jon.

It’s pretty crazy and freaky that all of this should happen in the midst of something so great in my professional life. Right?

So why am I sharing all of this with you?

I promise, it’s not to complain or get sympathy.

It’s because all of the anxiety and stress on my part wasn’t just random.

I was experiencing what Gay Hendricks in The Big Leap explains as “Upper Limiting.”

Upper Limiting is when things are going so WELL, and you’re feeling so GOOD, that you simply hit an “upper limit” on that good feeling and start sabotaging yourself.

In my case, it was as if I just couldn’t allow myself to fully enjoy and bask in the glow of leading a phenomenal retreat.

To distract myself from really taking that in, I sabotaged my relaxing bath, I forgot to “pump” on my break and created my milk duct clog, and I incited tension between me and Jon for something as silly as sleeping at my very comfortable in-laws’ house for a few days.

Feeling THAT good was just too much.

I’ve been teaching my clients about the phenomena of not being able to fully take in “goodness” for a few years now, because I see how pervasive it can be for entrepreneurs. Something really wonderful happens in your business, and then, BAM! You do something else to completely take yourself down.

What I’m happy to report is that, the more I’ve worked on this for myself (and the more my clients work on it), the easier and easier it is to spot, and then course correct your Upper Limit and move more fully into success and feeling good.

So, please take note for yourself. The next time something really amazing happens in your business and your life, yet you find yourself:

–getting sick
–picking fights
–doing something to sabotage what you’ve created
–worrying
–being upset when you should be celebrating

…remember this article and that it is probably just your knee-jerk reaction to not feel UBER good in your life.

And then call yourself out on what you’re doing, course correct, and TAKE IN the goodness that you’re creating.

This will not only lead to feeling great, but it will lead to your ability to create more and more success in your life and business.

One of the BIGGEST places I see entrepreneurs hit their upper limit is when they aren’t fully prepared to have a powerful enrollment conversation with a prospect.

I want to help with that! So be on the lookout next week for a VERY special invitation coming your way!

Xoxoxoxoxo,
Joanna

How To Manifest Anything

November 14th, 2014 by Joanna Lindenbaum

Over the last 5-10 years, “manifestation” has become a catchphrase.

Some folks teach that all you need to do to manifest something is to visualize it…and the Universe will take care of the rest.

Others say you need rare mystical, magical powers in order to manifest. Either you got it or you don’t.

And yet others claim that you need hard-core, break-your-back action for manifestation to happen.

The most powerful manifestations in my life defy these teachings.

What I’ve come to learn is that manifestation is actually a beautiful combination & balance of 6 powerful principles that anyone can use.

1. Activate Your Conscious Self To Get Clear On What You Want.

In order to manifest, you need to know what you want. If not, then it is very difficult to co-create.

Think of it this way — if you just say “I want a house”, well, there is a huge range of the kind of house you may end up living in. But if you can clarify that you want to live in a 3-bedroom ranch in California with a renovated kitchen on at least an acre of land, then you’ve got much more manifesting information to work with.

Whether it’s manifesting 10 clients, or more free time, or a romantic partner, do some real self-inquiry to uncover exactly what it is you want with as much detail as possible.

You use your “Conscious Self” (otherwise known as your pre-frontal cortex) — the part of yourself & your brain that reasons, computes and thinks — to get clear here.

2. Activate Your Highest Self To Commit To What You Want.

In every manifestation process, there is a moment of choice — to commit or not to commit.

It might sound obvious that you need to commit in order to create.

But I’ve seen it happen (for myself & others) too may times. When you don’t truly commit, when you don’t truly make that choice inside of yourself to bring something into your life, then the Universe doesn’t really get the clear message to go ahead and help you manifest.

Your Conscious Self can’t make this commitment. It’s your Highest Self — the deeper part of yourself that really runs the show — that makes the choice here. While your Conscious Self responds well to “thoughts”, your Highest Self responds well to feelings.

So, part of making the commitment is to really feel deep inside of yourself what you want and to emote it.

3. Communicate With “The Universe” (Spirit, God, Energy, Nature…) To Ease The Path.

Manifestation, at its core, is a co-creation between your conscious self, your highest self, and the Universe.

You can absolutely accomplish things by sheer action, without getting the Universe involved. But it’s been my experience that bringing in the Universe helps get things done MUCH more easefully and meaningfully.

This is the part of the manifestation process that the book, “The Secret”, made famous. Some of my favorite ways to connect in with Spirit on what I want are to visualize, make a dream collage, meditate and pray on it.

4. Take Action.

Connecting in with what you want, committing, and then letting Spirit lead the way is often NOT enough to get it done.

This is where folks that expect “manifestation” to be totally Universe-led and out-of-their-hands get really frustrated and disappointed.

Remember, manifesting is a sacred intersection and co-creation between yourself and spirit.

And what’s required is for you to take action. Sometimes it can be one simple, elegant action to take. And other times, it’s a plan — a series of actions over time.

5. Be Open (For Instructions, Pathways Or Better Ideas/Opportunities To Come Your Way).

This is where, if you’ve invited the Universe to co-create with you, it really kicks into high gear.

I have seen this happen time and time again. When you follow this manifestation formula, the Universe will actually present an idea or opportunity that is even better than the one you expected might happen.

The trick, though, is to be open enough to notice the suggestion, perceptive enough to realize it’s a sign from the Universe, and then courageous enough to follow it.

Yes, it’s wonderful to have a plan of action to follow when you manifest. But being flexible with that plan and allowing for unexpected opportunities to support you makes the process that much more easeful, magical, satisfying…and usually more successful.

6. Savor And Be In Gratitude.

Worst thing ever is to actually manifest what you want, and then to not notice or appreciate it (or complain about it!).

It sends “Don’t Manifest Again!” signals to your highest self and the Universe. It also is just generally not fun.

Once you bring something you desire into being, celebrate it, honor it, and be happy about it!

What are you ready to manifest? Can’t wait for you to use these principles and let me know all about it!

Sometimes we need help manifesting.

That’s why I’m such a big fan of coaching (& have hired my fair share of coaches over the last 8 years).

I want to remind you that my team and I are 100% here for you if you know you want support achieving your business & happiness goals.

My passion is to help women who are smart & soulful bring their message to the world in big ways, create an income, and learn to love & honor themselves deeply along the way.

If you’re ready, we’re here.

Just let us know, and we’ll set a time to talk.

I’m proud to say I’ve supported countless women who have been blown away by what they’ve received. And I would be proud and honored to support you as well.

Get in touch at info@soulfulcoach.com, and we’ll get a complimentary Intuition Activation call on the calendar right away.

Xoxoxoxoxo,
Joanna

10 Women & 5 Books That Have Made My Life And Business Better

November 7th, 2014 by Joanna Lindenbaum

I LOVE books.
So much.

Since I’ve been young, books have impacted me deeply and shaped who I am.

So, I thought it would be fun this week to share with you 5 of my favorite books that have made a huge impression on me as a person, woman, leader and entrepreneur.

It was so hard to pick 5 from my library, but something really cool happened as I did.

I realized that not only were these 5 books written by 5 inspiring women, but also that each of these 5 books were given to me or suggested to me by 5 beloved mentors who have made a huge impact in my life.

So, that’s 10 women and 5 books that have made my life and business better. They have helped paved the way for my success, I am so grateful for them, and I use them in my own teachings.

Here they are:

A Woman’s Worth By Marianne Williamson

This is the first official spiritual self-help book that I ever read. I was 17 years old when Marina Maurino, my first boyfriend’s mother (who was truly my first spiritual mentor), gave it to me. Thank goodness — it put me on a sacred path of self-love and reverence that has changed my life.

I use the teachings in this book to help my clients reconnect with their highest self and with Spirit, and remember that you were put on this earth for a very sacred reason.

To be successful in business, owning your worth as a woman is vital.

The Gifts of Imperfection By Brené Brown

One of my mentors, Heather Dominick, turned me on to Brené’s wisdom about 2 years ago, and I am continually amazed and transformed by every paragraph Brené writes or speaks.

In business and life, trying to be “perfect” is a big recipe for disaster. In The Gifts of Imperfection, Brené untangles the personal, cultural, religious and pop culture roots of the cult of perfection while teaching you how to transcend it in order to be…your beautiful, imperfect self.

A big part of the work I do with women entrepreneurs is helping get rid of the Perfection Monkey so you can build an ease-ful and enjoyable business.

Addiction To Perfection By Marion Woodman

Yup, another book centering on “perfection” — I’m a nit-picky self-judgmental Virgo, so I need this lesson over and over again.

Another one of my beloved spiritual mentors — Sherene Shostak — gave this to me when I was 25 and in need of understanding why I was so compelled to always be so hard on myself, as well as my tendencies towards overwork and over-partying.

This book has been landmark in my business development, because it’s allowed me to understand how my Perfectionist wants to take me down, and has given me tools to move past it. The “take-me-down” tendencies are something I support my clients in moving past every day. Marion’s wise words – which are like a Jungian analysis session – are always behind this work!

Women Who Run With The Wolves By Clarissa Pinkola Estes

My current work with entrepreneurs started through my work as a women’s empowerment ritualist. One of my most beloved spiritual mentors, Alisa Starkweather, recommended this book to me in my late 20s, and it has touched me deeply.

If you ever forget or doubt that your feminine power is innate or divine, if you ever fret because you don’t fit into “normal” womanhood, if you ever long to connect in with the deepest, rawest most wise part of yourself…then this book is for you.

Not only will it help you love who you are deeply, it will give you permission to be exactly who you’re meant to be in your life and business.

This is something I am so committed to with all of my clients. Love yourself and business success is on its way.

Take Time For Your Life By Cheryl Richardson

My very first coach & coaching mentor ever, Chrissy Carew, turned me on to Cheryl Richardson. In my early 30s, this book became my personal & professional bible on getting crystal clear on priorities and creating time for myself.

Marketing plans are no good if time isn’t approached the right way.

Cheryl’s wisdom was the original inspiration for the work I developed around time, productivity and freedom, called How to Move with the Flow of Time (& Not Against It).

I am so glad I was able to share these women & these personal inspirations with you!

I’d love to hear if you’ve read any of these, how they’ve impacted you, and also what some of your other favorites are.

And — if you feel called to deeply learn all of the principles I mentioned here while also getting the foundational marketing tools you need to grow your business, get in touch!

Either one of my team members or myself will be in touch to set up a complimentary time to speak and see how we can help.

Xoxoxoxoxo,
Joanna

How To Move Prospects Through Resistance

October 31st, 2014 by Joanna Lindenbaum

If you’re in business, you have at one time (or many times!) experienced resistance from prospects who are considering buying your services or products.

Some of the most popular resistances can come in the form of:

“I don’t have enough money.”
“I don’t have enough time.”
“I’d do it if it were at X time, but now isn’t good.”

Sound familiar?

Here are a few important tools to help walk prospects through resistance so that they can step into your services and be excited about it:

Understand that Resistance is just Fear:

Resistance, at its core, is fear. Nothing more, nothing less.

Why would a prospect be fearful of working with you?

Because it means that if they commit, they’re going to have to change.

They’re going to have to step into a bigger version of themselves. They’re going to have to break pattern. They’re going to have to take action. They’re going to have to change.

And even though your prospects want change, it also scares the living daylights of them.

With this perspective in mind, you — the entrepreneur — can totally get that when someone says, “I really want to work with you but it’s too expensive” — they’re not devaluing your work or thinking your services aren’t worth it.

Rather, they’re subconsciously thinking: “I don’t know if I am feeling really ready to accomplish what I really want for myself. It’s way easier to stay stuck & blame it on money than on the fact that I am scared to change.”

The more you can really understand this, the easier it will be to walk your prospects through their resistance (fear), because you won’t be taking their resistance personally.

And when you don’t take resistance personally, you won’t get in your own way, or back down out of your own fear or your own “money” or “time” story.

Instead, you can stand tall and confident to see the bigger picture and what’s really going on, and lead your prospect wisely to move through their resistance.

Be Willing to Lead an Exploration around the Resistance.

What most entrepreneurs do when they experience prospect resistance is to simply give up and move on.

When you do this, you are doing yourself — and your prospect (who really needs and wants your help) — a huge disservice.

Instead, because you now understand that resistance is simply a form of fear, do some exploration with your prospect around the resistance to help her move past it.

How do you do that?

Well, unfortunately, there’s no “cookie cutter” answer here. It’s a learned skill that I help my clients master over time. But here are some pointers to get you started:

1) Help your prospect to feel heard:

The worst thing you can do is to make your prospect feel like she hasn’t been seen or heard. That’s a surefire way for her to either disconnect from the conversation or get more emphatic in her resistance.

Helping her feel heard might go something like this: “I totally get that it feels like you don’t have enough time to do this work together. I have SO been there before.”

2) Lovingly point out that her resistance might actually be fear:

For example: “And, I also know that when I felt like I didn’t have enough time to make these changes, it wasn’t actually true. “Not having enough time” is often just my MO for avoiding things that were really important to me. Does that resonate for you?”

3) Ask permission to explore the fear:

For example: “Would you be willing to explore what’s going on for you here?”

Asking permission to explore this is such a powerful moment for your prospect to recognize their fear pattern and open up to changing it.

4) Ask powerful questions to help your prospect move through her fear and resistance:

Instead of “telling” your prospect why she should move through her resistance, it’s much more effective to guide her through a series of questions that will allow her to understand herself and her patterns more deeply, as well as connect in with what she really wants.

Knowing how to walk prospects through resistance, as well as how to create a powerful & authentic Enrollment Process that isn’t “sales-y” is vital to any business. In my experience, it takes more than a couple of instructions to master this skill, and that’s why I walk my clients step-by-step through the inner and outer tools for having a successful conversation.

The next day-long virtual training on enrollment conversation is happening next month!

If you feel ready to master the enrollment conversation, expand your business authentically and receive high-level business support & coaching, get in touch for a complimentary Intuition Activation call.

On this call, you’ll connect with one of my trained-by-me coaches, and together you’ll explore what’s going on in your business, where you want to go, and how we can help you.

With love,
Joanna

I Almost Didn’t Send This…

October 24th, 2014 by Joanna Lindenbaum

I was feeling really tired this week and not in the mood to write a newsletter article.

Just being honest. ☺

But something about it wasn’t sitting right with me.

I am so committed to bringing you weekly inspiration, guidance, motivation and tools…I didn’t want to miss a week.

Inspiration struck, and while this is much shorter than my “regular” articles for you, I decided better to be imperfect than not connect with you at all.

So here it is! (And if you like this shorter format, let us know. Maybe I’ll do one of these a month for ya!).

And, in case you didn’t read last week’s article on how to guerilla market in a soul-centered way, it is a MUST. We received a ton of love-filled feedback on it.

Here it is: http://tinyurl.com/n75fpuh

And here is this week’s little piece of wisdom, imperfectly, straight from my heart to yours:

We are born into love and grow into gratitude.
 

In my experience (& what I’ve observed of others), gratitude is not inherent. It’s something you need to consciously work on and work toward.

That’s why there are so many folks (myself sometimes included) who don’t automatically have an amazing day just because it’s beautiful out, or because you have a roof over your head, or organic food to eat, or someone to love, or a new client…even when you *know* that gratitude is a good thing and can make life and business much better.

I’m convinced that we’re born inherently feeling love but not gratitude.

I see it in my little baby. She’s not necessarily *appreciative* when I nurse her or pick her up from crying.

I sense it’s because she feels entitled to these things. She expects to have it.

And we all do.

For as much as you may not feel entitled in your life…I believe there’s a part of you that inherently feels entitled to EVERYTHING you want and desire.

It’s your birthright. You deserve it and you know it.

This is amazing and beautiful…and…it’s vital to work the gratitude muscle so that you can fully ENJOY all that you’re entitled to.

Gratitude helps you stand taller and more confident in your business.
Gratitude helps you attract more aligned clients.
Gratitude helps you continue to take action that works.
Gratitude fuels you so you have energy to keep on going.

We are born into love and grow into gratitude and ability to enjoy.

Remember to notice the amazing things in your life & business, big and small.
Remember to say thank you (to others, to yourself, and to spirit).
Remember to ask for more, when you want it.

FYI: We still have a few spots open in Your Sacred Business 2.0 and the more advanced Soulful Leader Intensive. Get in touch at info@soulfulcoach.com if you want to learn more and explore if one is right for you!

With love,
Joanna

How I Filled My First Charlotte Event (With A Waiting List!)

October 17th, 2014 by Joanna Lindenbaum

Last year I hosted my first local event since moving to Charlotte. It was a day-long training called Be Seen, all about overcoming your fear of visibility and then creating an aligned strategy to become more visible.

I rented a space that held 50 people, and it was my intention to fill the room.

But at that point I had only lived in Charlotte for a year and didn’t know many people. I knew that simply creating a campaign for Be Seen in my newsletter wasn’t going to cut it (because my newsletter community & client base is international), and that I needed to connect in with folks here in Charlotte to fill the room.

It was a situation for Soul-Centered Guerilla Marketing.

So, what is Soul-Centered Guerilla Marketing?

It’s an intense, persistent and consistent grassroots strategy for giving it “all you’ve got” in order to fill an offering or program.

I am not a big fan of working intensely, because I really believe in sustainable and energizing growth. However, every now and again, there comes a time where it’s appropriate to “go guerilla” and do whatever it takes to fill the room.

Now, just to be clear — I’m not talking about over-working or working late into the night.

Soul-Centered Guerilla Marketing isn’t about wearing you out. It’s about persistent & consistent, no-stone-unturned, grassroots outreach on all levels. (BTW — to do this requires you to stand in your value and be willing to reach out and stretch yourself.)

Here’s what I did to fill Be Seen with a waiting list in a town where I had few connections:

Step 1) 6 weeks before the event, I sent an individual email to EVERYONE I knew here in Charlotte that would be remotely interested in the training or who might know people who were interested in the training. It wasn’t that many people because I didn’t know too many folks here yet.

In that email, I invited recipients to come, and I also asked that they let anyone they know who would be perfect for Be Seen to come as well. And I created a special discounted rate for all those folks.

Step 2) After about a week, I hadn’t really heard back from anyone (it was the week between Christmas and New Years), so I wrote a follow-up email to each individual person.

And then registrations started to come in. By the beginning week of January I had 7 women registered.

Step 3) I went back to my rolodex and emailed anyone else I knew that hadn’t gotten the original email, even folks that were long shots.

Step 4) I sent a campaign out to my newsletter community.

By the end of the first week of January, we were up to 17.

Step 5) Next, I got in touch with 3 women I knew who were highly connected – and they agreed to send out emails to their entire communities on my behalf.

Step 6) I also invited everyone who was already registered to invite a friend for a discounted rate.

By the end of the second week of January we were already up to 36, and I had two weeks to go.

I was feeling pretty good because I was a newcomer in town and had attracted in a nice amount of participants, but I didn’t stop there, because I was determined to reach 50. I knew more guerilla marketing had to be done.

Step 7) Next, I went online to a website that is a community of Charlotte healing practitioners – my ideal clients. I viewed every woman who advertised on that site, and researched her website, and emailed her individually to introduce myself and make an invitation.

6 more women stepped in through those invites. I was at 42.

Step 8) Finally, I went to Facebook. I did a search on any entrepreneur that I was connected with that lived in the Charlotte area (I’m friends with nearly 5,000 folks on FB, so you can imagine, I didn’t know most of those women personally). And I sent each and every one that looked like a possible ideal client an individual message through Facebook, introducing myself and making an invitation to Be Seen.

By 10 days before the event, I was at 52 RSVPs, with a waiting list of 4, and more tried to register after that.

The day of the event, the room was packed, and I was told by a number of the women that no one ever attracts this many people to a workshop in Charlotte.

They wanted to know how I did it.

Tee hee, sometimes you just need to go guerilla!

If I can guerilla market, so can you. The key is to have a good plan that matches your goals and marketing environment, incredible copy that magnetizes potential clients, and inner confidence to outreach and outreach again and followup.

If you’d like help with filling your programs and growing your business, let’s talk!

I am proud to lead a team of world-class coaches who specialize in supporting soul-centered entrepreneurs who are D.O.N.E. with spinning your wheels, feeling frustrated, not being clear on your plan, and feeling alone in your business.

I currently have openings in 2 programs that are designed to hold your hand while you build your business authentically and successfully, without losing your sacred core.

If you’d like to learn more, get in touch for a complimentary Intuition Activation Call. It is 60 minutes of 1-on-1 coaching and conversation that will change your business and mindset forever.

We’ve got only a few spots left, so get in touch ASAP at info@soulfulcoach.com.

 

No Matter What, Don’t Do This

September 28th, 2014 by Joanna Lindenbaum

In my decade of being an entrepreneur, I’ve made a lot of mistakes.

Some have been mild, some bigger. And then there have been the handful of mistakes that could have been absolute deal-breakers for my business had I not corrected my course.

There’s one lesson in particular that I want to share with you today. It’s one that I have learned the hard way, and has left over-working and heart-ache in its wake:

Don’t try to make everyone like you.

(This includes community members, prospects, team members, partners, family members…even clients!)

If you’re anything like me, it’s pretty important to you that people like you, think you’re a good person, think you’re smart & good at what you do, and generally want to be around you.

In some ways, this desire can seem harmless, even recommended.

But here’s the truth: if you believe that everyone needs to like you in order to grow your business, you’re probably going to end up pretty miserable and not as successful as you could be.

Here’s why: If you are a woman who is on fire to speak your truth, serve your clients and committed to spreading your Sacred Message through your business, there is no possible way that everyone who comes across you and your work is going to resonate with you, like you and agree with how you’re doing things.

Taking that a step further — there’s just no way in general (entrepreneur or not) that everyone is going to like you. I’ll bet that even Mother Theresa had some haters.

Putting forward the effort to do whatever it takes so that everyone will adore you is a losing battle.

Not only that, but it is a totally exhausting exercise that usually leads you away from activities that are aligned for you, your business growth, and your happiness.

For example:

  • If you write your newsletter so that everyone will like you and what you say, it will probably take you twice as long to find the right words, and you’re likely coming up with a watered-down version of what you really want to say, which won’t appeal as strongly to those who are meant to hear it.

  • When you’re working with clients, if you aren’t honest with them about where you see they’re stuck because you’re scared they’ll get upset, your clients aren’t going to move forward.
  • If joint-venture partners don’t follow through on commitments, if you’re scared to request they do because you don’t want to seem “uncool” for following up, then all the effort you’ve put towards that JV is wasted…and you end up feeling either angry or ignored.
  • If you don’t take days off because you want folks to feel you’re there for them no matter what, your community/clients won’t necessarily feel more supported, but you’ll feel super-tired and resentful.

Instead of trying to make everyone like you, here are some tips to support you in true business growth and self-acceptance:

Work on Loving Yourself
When we really need for other people to like and admire us, it’s usually a sign that there may be something lacking in the Self-Love Department. Instead of putting forward lots of effort to fill the “never-really-full” well of feeling others like you, focus that energy towards loving yourself. It’s much more sustainable and long-lasting.

Focus on Folks who Want to Hear Your Message and Forget the Rest
When spreading your message and outreaching about your work, you’ve got 2 choices: focus on the folks that really resonate with what you have to say…or focus on convincing the folks that aren’t really into you that you’re valuable. Guess which one take is much more energizing and success-oriented?

Deliver Instructions, Requests and Feedback with Honesty and Love
Part of not needing to be liked is being able to cleanly and clearly ask your team, partners and personal support system (family, babysitters, friends) what you need of them…this also includes giving feedback & suggestions to your clients. I know it can be easy to get scared that you’ll piss someone off if you correct their work or ask them to take the kids so you can get stuff done, but if done with love and honesty, it will serve you (& them!) greatly.

So, as you move forward, I invite you to shift from “needing to be liked” to knowing that you are of full value and allow your true self to shine through!

Much love,
Joanna

Does Facebook Make You Feel Fat?

September 12th, 2014 by Joanna Lindenbaum

In this age of social media, it’s so easy to keep up with your friend’s trip to Peru, your cousin’s birthday, watch friends’ kids take their first steps, learn about amazing events and causes, and keep up with what your colleagues are creating & teaching.

And of course, as an entrepreneur, Facebook is an incredible tool for expanding your reach and community, and communicating with those that want to learn from you.

But here’s what I’ve observed as the downside of Facebook, both for myself and lots of women I speak with:

Sometimes you see the amazing things other folks are doing on Facebook, and you start to feel bad about yourself. It looks like other people are:

–making more money than you
–working with more clients than you
–partnering with “cooler” people than you
–getting their books published when you haven’t started your manuscript yet
–getting more “Likes” than you
–posting brilliant thoughts and ideas that you have but haven’t posted yet!

Even if you’re super-accomplished or generally feel good about yourself and your business, Facebook can become a dangerous trap for hating on yourself, judging yourself, feeling “less-than”, and forgetting how amazing you actually are.

Why?

Because it’s human nature to compare yourself to others (unless you’re a monk meditating alone on a mountaintop!), and social media is one of the quickest, easiest ways to find out what other people are up to.

So how do you enjoy Facebook and use it to spread your Sacred Message without feeling sh*tty about yourself? Here are some tips:

Understand that Not Everyone Tells the Truth on Facebook:

I hate to say this, but some people lie, exaggerate or leave out important details on Facebook. It’s unfortunately part of Facebook culture for some folks, especially for those who want to project a certain image for their businesses.

It’s important that you know this because when it seems like some people always have great days, it’s not necessarily the case. We all have bad days here and there, or program launches that didn’t quite go as planned or hiccups in a campaign. Don’t compare yourself to “perfection”- it doesn’t exist.

Be Very Conscious about Why You’re Reading Other People’s Posts:

Because I know I’m sometimes prone to beat up on myself when reading other people’s posts, I am super-mindful about my reasons for reading them.

If my intention is to read my newsfeed to get inspiration from what others are doing or to keep up with friends and colleagues, I go ahead and do it. But, if I know I’m not feeling great about myself in that moment, or I’m going on because I really want to see how such & such a person’s campaign or event is going, it’s a red flag for me to find another business-building activity to do in that moment.

Create a Practice of Being Inspired By Other People’s Wins:

Here’s a fun experiment to try – before you go on Facebook, spend a quiet moment with yourself and set the intention to become more and more inspired and motivated by every positive Facebook post that your read.

Then give yourself a limit of reading 10-20 posts, and after each post that details a celebration of a colleague, literally visualize his or her celebration as lifting YOU up and contributing to your next success.

Take a Facebook Break:

While I’m all about being persistent and consistent in your marketing activities, it’s perfectly fine (& sometimes necessary!) to take a day-long or week-long (or month-long!) break from social media.

Taking a hiatus can give you time and space to bring your focus back to your own business and build happiness there, which is where it should be!

Bottom Line: It’s so important to take care of yourself and your emotional well-being, and if Facebook has been making you feel unworthy, begin to take note and take action to bring yourself into right relationship with your social media activities.

Much love,
Joanna

What Your Family Has To Do With Your Business

August 15th, 2014 by Joanna Lindenbaum

(even if you don’t speak to anyone in your family)

If you’ve got business relationships – with clients, team members, joint-venture partners, or vendors – that drain you, upset you, anger you or make you feel bad, chances are those relationships are holding you back from growth in one way or another.

And, the quickest way to bring business relationships into "right relationship" is to understand your own family dynamics.

The best example I can give you is from my own business:

A few years ago, right when I was about to cross the 6-figure mark in my business, I was feeling incredibly drained.

Even though I loved my clients and loved the work I was doing with them, I was working way too many hours than was good for my health, and I was stressed out all the time.

Even when I wasn’t working, I was thinking about work.

And about my clients.

And whether my clients were doing well or not.

And that would lead me to email them to check in to see how they were doing.
And then to email them again if I didn’t hear back.

And then to make up a story about my worth if they weren’t doing well or I didn’t hear back from them.

My anxiety level was through the roof.

Even though my business was earning more money and serving more clients than it ever had before, I couldn’t have been more miserable.

That’s because I was taking over-responsibility for my clients, big time.

What I thankfully came to realize after a few months of "over-responsibility hell" is that I was living out the dynamics of my family of origin through my relationships with my clients.

See, in my family of origin, I was always the one whom everyone relied on. My mom was very sick, and that put a lot of pressure on everyone. I was always there for each of my family members, and I was expected to go above and beyond when it came to taking care of them and making sure they were ok. Even as a little girl of 8 or 9 years old, I was taking way too much responsibility for my mom and sister.

And that just became the primary way I operated in lots of my relationships as I became an adult. It came so naturally to me, I didn’t even notice it.

It wasn’t until I was so stressed out by my business that I could see I was simply repeating that pattern of over-responsibility with my clients.

And once I became aware of that, I could then see so clearly how it wasn’t just my clients. I was also supporting my team more than my team was supporting me, and giving more to joint venture partners than I was receiving.

What a light bulb moment!

Once I became aware of the dynamic, I was able to change it. That’s because I could see what I was doing – it wasn’t in my blind spot anymore.

I’ve observed family-of-origin dynamics making their way into pretty much every business that I have supported over the years:

–If you played the role of caretaker in your family of origin, you’re playing that somewhere in your business

–If you played the role of holding other people’s anger in your family, it’s showing up somewhere in your business relationships

–If you played the role of peacekeeper, it’s showing up somewhere in your business

–If you always hid yourself because of family jealousy, it’s showing up somewhere in your business

For those of us that are coaches, teachers, mentors, and in any business that is service oriented…we are RELATIONSHIP people. Our relationships with our clients first and foremost, and then our business relationships, are super important to us and to the health and growth of our business.

But when your business relationships aren’t totally aligned or in "right relationship", that’s when lots of heartache, overwork and anxiety can happen.

Journaling Questions:

I take my clients through a deep and transformative process to truly uncover and then heal your business relationships, and I’d love to share some of the first steps with you here today:

  1. Which of your business relationships are causing you stress, anxiety, or time/energy drain? (Think about each of your clients, team members, partnerships, vendors, etc.)
  2. What is it about the relationship that is causing the stress? What is the role that you’re playing? What is the role that the other person is playing?
  3. Which one of your family relationships does this remind you of?

I recommend taking some time to journal on these important questions, and would love to hear what they reveal to you!


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© 2009-2014 Soulful Coach, Brooklyn, NY
Joanna Lindenbaum is a life coach and inspirational speaker.
She helps women in the following areas: work/life balance, career change, prosperity,
time management, creativity, leadership, and spirituality.

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